


the body sometimes needs a storm to rearrange its parts

by smallredboy



Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: Blindness, Caretaking, Domestic, Eye Trauma, F/F, Injury Recovery, Post-Episode: e155 Cost of Living (The Magnus Archives), Self-Harm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-03
Updated: 2020-07-03
Packaged: 2021-03-04 18:55:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25041244
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/smallredboy/pseuds/smallredboy
Summary: Melanie recovers from her injuries at Georgie's place.
Relationships: Georgie Barker/Melanie King
Comments: 21
Kudos: 47
Collections: Froday Flash Fiction Little & Monthly Specials 2020, Gen Prompt Bingo Round 18, Hurt/Comfort Bingo - Round 11, Prompt Table Challenge: Clouds and Shadows, femslashficlets: tarot prompt challenge





	the body sometimes needs a storm to rearrange its parts

**Author's Note:**

> **gen prompt bingo:** self-harm  
>  **hc bingo:** loss of vision  
>  **femslashficlets tarot table:** The Hanged Man  
>  **fffc's 100th special:** blind  
>  **clouds and shadows @ creativechallenges:** taking care of somebody
> 
> i didn't go too deep into blindness and what it's like because, I Am Not Blind! but i still really wanted to write this down after listening to e155. i'm also quite squicked out by eye trauma but i still did my best with this. ouch @ melanie blinding herself with an awl.
> 
> some notes: in my head melanie is black and georgie is filipino. absolutely unnecessary for reading, but i just thought y'all should know
> 
> enjoy!

Melanie knows, by all logical extension, that Georgie would be extremely freaked out by the fact she is going to blind herself. So she doesn't try to talk it out with her beforehand, simply texts her before talking to Jon about it, about how he should call an ambulance in about five minutes.

**hi babe. so basically jon found a way to quit the institute and i'm going through with it. i knew you'd be too worried to let me so i'm sending you this from work. i'm going to blind myself. this is the only way i can move on from the archives. i love you. please don't worry too hard. <3**

After the conversation, she grabs the awl she got from the library, weighs it in her hand. It doesn't feel as hard as it should to do this — it feels natural, like some part of destiny.

She swallows, controls herself, controls every one of her actions. She takes the awl in her hand, looks at its sharp point, at the way it will go through her eye. And, as much as she should, she doesn't hesitate.

She drives it into her left eye and she screams, blood seeping out from it, her vision becoming blurry and fuzzy at the edges. She pulls the awl out of her eye and she can see the jelly-like substance of her sclera.

She draws in a shaky breath as her head starts to pound before driving it into her other eye.

And then darkness. Suddenly, darkness.

* * *

There are still light shifts, but she is legally and mostly blind. As Georgie fights tooth and nail to not have her institutionalized (because no matter what they do, it is clear the wounds are self-inflicted), she slowly starts to recover.

There is no tie pulling her to the Magnus Institute. All she has is peace, the idea that she is _free_ coursing through her veins. She's free from the misery of being there, stuck there, doing nothing and doing everything. Maybe they're trying to save the world — maybe they're trying to end it. She doesn't know and she doesn't care. She can't see and that means the Eye can't see _her_.

"You should've told me," Georgie says as she settles next to her in bed, her warm presence making her smile. She fumbles with her hands before wrapping her arms around her, keeping her close.

"I just felt like you wouldn't have let me."

"I wouldn't have let you do it on your _own_ , at the very least," she says.

"What, gouge my eyes out yourself?" she jokes. 

"No. Just… make sure that you were safe." She swallows. "It was terrifying, to be there, you know, as they looked over you, made sure you were okay."

"I'm so glad they couldn't fix it in any way. That the damage was deep enough. Otherwise I — I probably would still be stuck there. But I can't feel _anything_ pulling me there anymore, Georgie, like it used to. When I had decided against doing my job I could feel it push, make me want to go through statements, through organizing, through doing research. I can't — I don't _feel_ that anymore."

"I'm glad," she says. She leans in to kiss her on the lips. The bandages are still there, and will be for a few more weeks. "I just wish it wasn't as… as drastic as this. You won't ever be able to see any more, Melanie."

"I'm well aware," she replies. "I will… I will figure it out. I'll learn Braille, listen to audiobooks, get a sight cane." She chuckles. "I'll figure it out, babe. Being blind is not the end of the world. It sucks, and it's weird, after being sighted all my life, but… but I know I can find a way to manage in here. To know how to deal with it."

"I love you," Georgie says, rather tenderly, her hand on her cheek. "I love you. And I'm going to help you as much as I can through all of this. I just… I just want you to be alright."

"I'm alright," she says, despite her destroyed eyes and the bandages wrapping over her face. "I'm alright."

"Whatever you say," she says. There's noise and she's getting out of bed. "Do you want something to eat?"

"Sure." She hums softly. "Could I get a, um, just some yogurt, please. My diet's supposed to be light, I think."

"Of course. I'll get you those lactose free ones at the back of the fridge. What flavor?"

"Uh, the strawberry one, if you still have it."

"Sure I do," she says. "I restock your lactose free stash of dairy whenever I can."

"You're an angel, you know," Melanie tells her lightly. She laughs in response. "But yeah, just… a spoon and the yogurt package."

"Yep." After a moment, her footsteps come back stronger. "Okay, we need to, uh, you need to straighten up a little, okay? I'll fix the pillows."

"Okay," she mumbles. She gets in a better position and gets comfortable. She offers a hand to where she hears Georgie's voice is coming from, and a cold plastic package is put in her hand; she grips at it and offers her a smile as she takes the spoon with her other hand. She takes a spoonful to her mouth and immediately relaxes. "Yeah, that's the good shit. Thank you, Georgie, love."

"No problem," she says. She presses a hand against Melanie's bonnet, which she's been wearing along her recovery to keep her hair in check. "It's no problem at all. Don't doubt to ask if you need anything through this whole process, okay? I'll get you a sight cane, Braille books, an Audible subscription." She laughs, vibrant and giddy — Melanie finds that she adores that sound. "Anything you want; anything at all."

"I only want you," she replies, leaning in clumsily to kiss her, again and again. And all is okay, right then and there.


End file.
